This is the night it all began...3 years ago

It all began 3 years ago on this night. I was 33 weeks pregnant with the baby I had prayed and prayed for. My mom and I spent the day shopping (I'm sure we bought way too many pink outfits, blankets and bows!). I was horribly uncomfortable all day, but just assumed it was normal pregnancy stuff. Later, the whole family sat at Pizza Inn laughing and talking - you know, normal family dinner stuff! Had this not been my first pregnancy, I would have known what was going on. Or had I read past the 33 weeks point in my "What to Expect..." book! But, it wasn't and I didn't!

I remember thinking that a hot bath would fix it all. I can still vividly remember sitting awkwardly in the tub, looking at my belly sticking out of the water and thinking what a miracle was going on in my body! What a blessing! Knowing now how that evening would end, I'm so glad I took the time to really soak in being pregnant. If we're being totally honest, it's probably the last time I will ever have a baby belly to see. So I'm glad that moment, that memory and that image is engrained in my head. I also should add that it's a miracle that I decided to shave my legs that night! HA!

Fresh out of the tub, smelling like my new Victoria Secret lotion I had treated myself to, and snug in my jammies, I sat at the computer making my list of things I needed to register for.

I can see it in my mind like it happened this morning. I know exactly what happened. I know exactly what Jamey and I said to each other. I haven't forgotten a think about this night, 3 years ago. I may not remember what I'm at Walmart to pick up, but I remember every sound, word and action from that night.

Anyway...as I'm sitting and registering for baby stuff, I experienced the scariest (and weirdest) feeling of my life. My water broke. It was so strange because in my head, I knew exactly what was happening. But it was so unexpected and out of the "plan" that it really couldn't sink in. I ran (yes, really ran!) into the living room and told Jamey what happened. We just stood there staring at each other. I remember it being such a surreal moment. Neither of us was panicked yet, but we shared this moment, this look that spoke a thousand words at once. Our eyes and our hearts were communicating what our brains and our mouths just couldn't. I don't know who finally broke the stare and the silence. But somehow Jamey ended up with the phone to call my Dr. I almost made him hang up because I was afraid maybe I had just peed on myself. My oh-so-practical husband quickly snapped me out of it by telling me there was no way I could have peed that much! Yep! That's the words of comfort he said! Ha!

So our journey began (or really just continued in a huge, scary way). I've typed this story before - I'm sure this is the 3rd time! But we ended up at our local hospital. They confirmed that I was, in fact, in labor. I was dilated to a 2. There was no way to stop my labor and it was best if I went to Little Rock or Memphis where there was a higher level NICU...just in case. The 3 words I did not want to hear.

Never in my life have I been so scared, yet peaceful and excited. I was scared of what was going to happen and how my life was changing. But at the same time, I just had this peace. This overwhelming calmness. I knew that my God was holding me. He had already written this chapter of my story, already walked it, and it would be OK. I just knew it!

I do remember the worst part was when the sweet nurse told me that my Dr. was probably going to send me somewhere else. I lost it at that point. My Dr. wasn't there yet and neither was any of my family. And I totally fell apart. I will never forget her, though. She took my hand and squeezed. She told me it was going to be fine. That girls are strong. Then she looked me in the eyes and told that there was absolutely nothing I could've done to cause this to happen. And that's what I needed to hear. I needed to know that my baby wasn't in danger because of something I had done.

So...that's how the best 3 years of my life began.

The most ironic thing is that at this moment - as I'm typing and as it was all happening 3 years ago - there's not a pregnant women in the bathtub...there's a very strong, stubborn, smart, sassy, beautiful, sweet, compassionate 3 year old girl playing and splashing and filling our house with the sounds of family.

Scariest night of my life? Yes! Would I do it again? Absolutely, 100 times over!

So tomorrow we will celebrate. We will celebrate the little miracle that took us by surprise and rocked our worlds from day 1!